Not trying to be too pessimistic. I’ve seen a lot of good responses on this sub and other places online. I’m not saying everyone is horrible. But a non-insignificant amount of people are responding in really disheartening ways, and as a young trans woman, I’m feeling disillusioned.
This is supposed to be a safe state, but there’s too many people taking the time to snide remarks about the victim, there’s people saying it doesn’t matter that she was trans, that other trans people are overreacting. Or they take the time not to talk about the danger trans women are in, or spare even a few words of any sympathy, but to talk about crime rates or prisons or race. And worst of all, there’s people who just don’t care. It’s all so fucking disgraceful.
And again, I’m trying hard not to be pessimistic, I know that undirected bitterness isn’t helpful. But I am really angry at people for not taking this seriously or having empathy. Someone belonging to a group with one of the highest rates of violence and murder was murdered, yes you should be concerned. And if you look around and see no one else is concerned? I think that should make you angry too.
Sympathy for the victim is good. Any kind words of support are more beneficial than you understand, and if you believe in any sort of afterlife then you probably agree that her soul deserves some kindness. And if the family becomes public I hope everyone gives them grace and support. But I need every fucking person in this state to understand that this is not a closed system and just as kind words will help scared trans women feel a little better, so will disrespect beat us down further.
Every comment I saw on discussions that had the gall to dance around calling her a woman, refusing to do the bare fucking minimum of giving her that respect, hurt me. And I know it has and will hurt other women.
The way people respond to this tragedy sends a message, and a lot of people have been sending a bad one. They’ve sent a message that if I or any of my sisters were killed too, they wouldn’t care. They’d deny me the basic right of expression even post mortem. Some would go as far to say that I deserve it.
I don’t think most people in this state are like that. But apparently there’s more than I thought, and I think we all need to get a little mad and push back on that, because god knows trans women need all the help we can get. Please.
I don’t know, this all hurt me in ways I don’t have the words to express. And it hurt an innocent woman my age enough to kill her. Whatever your takeaway is, remember that at least.
submitted by /u/CaregiverStunning802
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