I worked as a bartender at Grappa from January 2023 to September 2025.
Grappa is a small Italian restaurant tucked into the corner of Upper Queen Anne in Seattle. Anyone familiar with Queen Anne knows it has a small-town feel despite being in a city. You start recognizing the same faces every day — neighbors, regulars, people walking their dogs, stopping for coffee, grabbing groceries. It feels like “Groundhog Day,” but in a comforting way.
Grappa became well known in the neighborhood for surviving in a location where restaurants supposedly never lasted more than a year. By the time I worked there, they were approaching 10 years in business.
The restaurant was owned by Yekta Lavent alongside another owner named Nuri.
Starting at Grappa
I was hired almost immediately over a phone interview by the manager at the time, Kianu. Very early on, I realized the restaurant was disorganized.
One of my first shifts was running the bar entirely by myself while the owner, Yekta L, came in to “test” how I handled it. Thankfully, I had studied the cocktail menu beforehand and managed to get through the shift successfully.
As time went on, I became close with many of the regular customers in Queen Anne. Honestly, the regulars were the main reason I stayed as long as I did. They appreciated my work far more than management ever did.
Management Problems
Eventually, the restaurant stopped having a true general manager. Instead, there were “shift leads” who acted as managers while simultaneously serving full sections of tables. Most decisions ultimately came from the owner.
The restaurant often felt chaotic and understaffed. The kitchen and front-of-house communication was difficult, and employees were frequently overwhelmed.
As a bartender, I eventually realized that if I didn’t take control of organizing and prepping the bar myself, things would completely fall apart. Our bar manager, Jesh, had worked there since the restaurant opened. He was creative and hardworking, but clearly exhausted from years of trying to hold things together with very little support.
There were constant situations where we would run out of ingredients or be completely unprepared for service if staff didn’t overextend themselves.
Hostile Workplace Incidents
One incident that stuck with me involved a server who became upset because he was assigned fewer tables during a busy shift so he could help support the bar while the restaurant was short-staffed.
The server decided to quit mid-shift and attempted to explain his frustration to the owner. During the conversation, the owner repeatedly interrupted him and yelled, “Then get the fuck out of here.”
The employee tried to explain himself, but the owner continued yelling over him. That employee left and never returned.
That moment really showed me the culture of the workplace.
Treatment of Employees
Over time, I witnessed behavior from management that made me increasingly uncomfortable.
I heard comments directed at employees about not speaking their native language at work.
I also witnessed favoritism, inappropriate relationships between management and employees, and situations where certain staff members appeared protected from consequences while others were punished.
There were multiple rumors and discussions among staff regarding managers pursuing relationships with employees they supervised. There was also constant gossip, invasive discussions about employees’ personal lives, and managers making comments about infidelity between workers.
The environment often felt unprofessional, toxic, and emotionally unsafe.
Concerns About Kitchen Management
The kitchen staff was largely made up of Hispanic workers, many of whom I felt were taken advantage of. I personally witnessed workers being underpaid relative to the workload expected of them.
I also witnessed management make inappropriate comments about kitchen staff and speak about them disrespectfully.
There were times when managers appeared more focused on controlling employees and monitoring cameras than actually supporting staff.
My Relationship and What Happened
During my time working there, I started dating someone who worked in the kitchen. We were together for about two years and eventually lived together.
One night after work, my partner invited the kitchen manager over to our home after the bars closed. An argument broke out after my partner accused me of flirting with the manager.
The situation escalated physically. I was hit and injured, and during the fight a knife was pulled. I called the police. I was crying, hurt, and left with a black eye. The police arrested my partner that night.
The next day, I contacted one of my shift leads and explained what happened. I showed him my injuries and told him I needed several days off to recover.
When I eventually returned to work, I was told that I needed to go upstairs into the office to meet with the owner, the head chef Pedro Zamora, my bar manager, and multiple male managers.
I became extremely uncomfortable and emotional. I told my coworker — who had actually checked on me after the incident — that I did not feel comfortable walking into a room alone to discuss an abusive domestic incident with several men at once.
I requested to speak only with the owner directly.
I was then told that either I attended the meeting as instructed or I could resign.
At that point, I chose to resign.
Double Standards
Later, I learned I was allegedly going to be written up for having a workplace relationship.
What made this especially upsetting was that multiple managers and employees at the restaurant were openly involved in relationships with coworkers for years without consequence.
When my former partner questioned why our relationship needed to be separated while management relationships were allowed, he was reportedly told:
“They cheat on each other. You and your girlfriend don’t.”
That statement has stayed with me ever since.
Why I’m Speaking About This Now
For a long time, I was scared to talk about my experience publicly because I worried nobody would believe me or take me seriously.
Part of the reason I stayed quiet was because I genuinely loved many of the people and regular customers in the Queen Anne community. I worked extremely hard for that restaurant, and despite everything, it was a huge part of my life for almost three years.
But recently, my former partner — the same partner involved in the domestic violence incident that ultimately led to my resignation — worked a shift there again. Seeing that reopened a lot for me emotionally and forced me to reflect on everything that happened, how it was handled, and how unsupported I felt during one of the hardest moments of my life.
That experience made me realize how much I had suppressed while trying to move on quietly.
I no longer feel comfortable staying silent about the environment I experienced while working there. In my experience, the workplace culture at Grappa involved intimidation, favoritism, inappropriate conduct, gossip, blurred professional boundaries, and a lack of emotional safety or accountability.
I cared deeply about my customers, my coworkers, and the community surrounding the restaurant. But behind the scenes, the environment often felt chaotic, toxic, and deeply unhealthy.
Writing this because I am honestly really hurt about everything, I hold a lot of grudges that I just want to let go, and I’m not one to give revenge but honestly that’s what I want for the men that run this place. I don’t know how to take them down, honestly they probably have more power than me.. which is sad for who they are, but if anyone has advice on what I can do let me know…
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